The Pirate Queen And His In-Laws
by Bluejay Blaze
Summary: When the news of Zoro and Luffy's upcoming marriage gets out, the Straw Hats have to deal with a few angry, overprotective visitors. Short and fluffy.
1. Garp and Shanks

"Did you know you have a spirit following you around?" Brook asked, pausing in his playing to poke Zoro with the bow of his fiddle. The swordsman opened his eye.

"What? No. Since when? And why the Hell would they be haunting me?"

"Yohohoho! If he was going to say, I'd already have told you. But he won't even show me his face!" Brook seemed to find the idea amusing at first, but he sobered up quickly. "He's been on the ship ever since we got back together, but for the past month all he's done is float behind your head. The anger he's started exuding sends shivers down my spine! Yohohohohoho!"

Zoro sighed and looked around, not expecting to see anything. He didn't. Still, he wondered what sort of ghost would haunt the Thousand Sunny, and him in particular. Not a vengeful one; they didn't exactly have a record as pirates who did much killing. "Well, tell me if he says who he is or what he wants." Zoro closed his eyes and was about to fall back asleep when a cry echoed across the deck.

"Ship off the port bow!" It was Usopp's voice. Zoro sighed and stood. With Luffy still laid out from their last fight, the swordsman had to actually _act_ as first mate for once.

"Colours?"

It took a moment for Usopp to answer- probably because he was used to Luffy rocketing up to see for himself. "Marines! It's Garp!" Across the ship, the entire crew paled. None of them liked tangling with Luffy's grandfather, and with their captain out...

"He's flying a flag of truce!"

_Well, that's interesting,_ Zoro thought, eyeing the ship. When no threat presented itself as they drew closer, he allowed the marines to pull alongside. There was a tremendous thud as Monkey D. Garp leapt from his own ship onto the Thousand Sunny. The aging marine was immediately met by Chopper. Arms waving in panic, the little doctor tried to drive Garp back.

"I'm sorry sir, but now really isn't a good time for a visit. Luffy's still recovering from our fight yesterday; he really shouldn't be put under any stress!"

"Not here to see my idiot grandson," Garp grumbled, "Not this time. I'm here for the moss-ball swordsman." Every other member of the Straw Hat crew took several steps back. Zoro gulped. He refused to admit it, but Garp scared him. That was okay though; Garp scared everybody.

"Is it true?" the vice-admiral demanded. "What I've heard about you and my grandson, is it true?"

"I don't know." Zoro forced a smirk onto his face. "What _did_ you hear, old man?"

"About a month ago, a little birdie came around and told me you'd proposed to Luffy? Is that true?" Garp picked Zoro up by the front of his clothes, effectively cutting off his air. The swordsman shook his head.

"No, that's not what happened." Zoro felt the aggression before him lessen, but couldn't keep his mouth shut. "_He_ proposed to _me_."

"What?" Zoro tucked into a ball as he was thrown, rolling back to his feet to meet Garp's furious gaze. "And what makes you think a pirate like you is worthy of my grandson?"

"In case you've forgotten, your grandson _is_ a pirate." Zoro replied, jumping out of the way of a punch. His leap would have carried him into another, had not a shadow stepped between the warring men.

"Hey, hey, calm down Garp. And he's right you know." Red hair flashed in the sunlight over a scarred face. On the opposite side of the Sunny from Garp's ship, a huge pirate vessel now floated.

"You!" If possible, Garp looked even more furious. "Just because Luffy chased you out to sea and became a pirate doesn't mean I'm gonna let him get married to the first scummy sailor who's sword work he fancies."

Shanks grinned. "Aww, come on Garp, they look so cute together!" A large hand suddenly descended to ruffle Zoro's hair. He growled, but didn't have the heart to push Shanks off. He was Luffy's idol, after all.

"Cute? Bah!" Garp snorted. "Luffy has enough cute on his own. My job is to make sure he married someone worthy of him."

"And what makes you qualified to decide that, hmm? Last time you two were in the same room for more than five minutes, you tried to arrest him."

The rage in Garp's face lessened and he looked off to the side. "I... I don't agree with Luffy's choices, but I do love him. If I can't make him change his ways, I at least want him to be happy."

Shanks nodded. "Good. That's what I want too. The little brat's practically a son to me, after all. Can't have him marrying some idiot."

"Can you please stop talking as if I'm not here?" Zoro ground out, removing Shanks' hand from his head. Two pairs of terrifying eyes turned to him, as if remembering he was the cause of their problems.

"How dare you seduce little Luffy-kun!" Shanks roared. The one armed man swung a sword at Zoro, forcing the younger pirate to duck away.

"Whoa, hang on! I didn't do anything!"

"Of course you did." Garp snarled. "You think my idiot grandson would even think about marriage on his own? Little brat barely understood the Talk!"

"That's because you're crap at explaining Jiji." Luffy's weak voice came from the cabin door. All fighting on deck ceased as everyone turned to look at the young captain. Bandages wrapped him from head to foot; some showed red where various wounds had reopened. Zoro rushed to Luffy's side to support him.

"You shouldn't be up yet captain." Luffy completely ignored him. Or at least, as much as you can ignore someone who's practically carrying you.

"And Shanks, Zoro didn't seduce me. I caught him!" Both older men stared incredulously at Luffy, but the rubber grin was totally honest. Shanks and Garp looked at each other, totally at loss. When they finally found their voices, they spoke in disbelieving unison.

"But... How?"

"Shishishishishi! Do you really wanna know?"

Face going red, Zoro clapped a hand over his captain's mouth. "No, I'm pretty sure they don't."

The next few minutes were relatively smooth sailing, so to speak. Once assured that Zoro had no insidious designs on Luffy (it was, in fact, the other way around, but Zoro didn't think he'd be believed), both Garp and Shanks were off on their way. Not, however, before demanding invitations to the wedding.

Zoro watched the larger ships sail away as Chopper took Luffy back to bed. Leaning on the rail, he felt a strange, warm presence beside him. When he turned his head to look, there was no one there.

"Still angry with me?" Zoro asked the air. "I'm pretty sure I know who you are, you know. You don't need to hide. He'd love having you on our ship, even if you're just a ghost."

The presence warmed a little, as if it were smiling. Zoro smiled back, then looked down at the water.

"I hope you weren't thinking I was gonna hurt him or anything. I would never... He's my captain, my best friend. Anywhere he goes, I'd always follow, married or not. I'm pretty sure I was in love with him a long time before I knew it."

The swordsman swore he felt a hand ruffle his hair, heard a low chuckle. Then something floating in the water caught his eye: a battered orange hat with beads wrapped around it, two faces strapped to the front. He immediately lowered a fishing line to pull the relic out.

"How'd this get here?" The presence seemed to pat him on the head again. Zoro smiled and put the hat on. "You don't have to worry, I'll look after him. But you've gotta stick around too. Even if he can't see or hear you, Luffy will always need his big brother."


	2. Dragon and Sabo

**A/N: So, this story was originally a one-shot, but since Sabo is still alive, I couldn't help adding another chapter. I hope it doesn't ruin the bittersweet ending of the first part.**

Ever since Luffy and Zoro had announced their engagement, it seemed like the Straw Hats were seeing much more of the Revolutionaries. Zoro supposed it was to be expected; Dragon was sending men to report on his son's suitor, the paranoid bastard. Not that Zoro could blame him. As the most wanted man in the world, Dragon had every right to be paranoid about whatever he wanted. Although Zoro did resent the suspicion directed at him. He may have been a former bounty hunter, but he would never turn in his father-in-law. It would make Luffy sad.

As it was, every time the Straw Hats ended up on an island these days, there was a revolutionary squad there who just happened to become involved in the adventure of the day. So Zoro supposed it was only a matter of time before a familiar top hat appeared. What he wasn't expecting was the lead pipe to the face.

"Not again," the swordsman grumbled. He quickly unsheathed Wado, blocking the swinging metal. The blast of fire that followed was significantly more difficult to deal with. Or it would have been, had it not been mysteriously repelled by the orange hat Zoro had taken to wearing.

"Good afternoon Roronoa-san." Leave it to Sabo to be perfectly polite even while trying to take your head off. He continued to swing his pipe at Zoro as he spoke. The swordsman, for his part, simply blocked and tried to escape from Luffy's brother.

"I received a letter recently inviting me to attend Lu's wedding- this is your idea of a joke, yes? Because Lu's not old enough to get married. I must say, such humour is in rather poor taste."

"Since when do you decide when Luffy can and can't do whatever the Hell he wants?"

"I'm his older brother- it's my job. And as Lu's older brother, it's my duty to inform you that Luffy will never be getting married, ever. He's too young and always will be."

The pipe swept upwards, catching on the rim of Zoro's hat and knocking it backwards. He silently thanked its maker for the medallion and string that kept it from flying off. "Dammit Sabo, Ace accepted it already! Why can't you?"

Sabo tried to hit Zoro with a Hiken, only for the flames to part around the swordsmen due to the blessing of Ace's old hat. "That may be true, but unfortunately, Ace is dead. I cannot confirm whether he's in his right mind, especially since he died thinking I was also dead and that he had to find someone else to protect Lu."

A wave of Haki flowed over the area, making the air heavy. "Stop."

Both Zoro and Sabo froze. They turned in sync to face the sad eyes pouting beneath a familiar straw hat. It was an expression both feared, although for different reasons. To Zoro's infinite relief, it was directed at Sabo.

"Nii-chan, stop picking on Zoro. It's not a joke and you don't get to say no. Zoro's gonna be Queen of the Pirates."

"But Lu-" Sabo fell silent, as if his words died in his throat. It took a moment for him to collect himself and try again.

"Lu, you're still a kid. Do you even know what," here Sabo gulped nervously, "What married people do?"

"Shishishishishi! Of course!" Luffy's face morphed from disappointed pout to lecherous grin. Zoro paled and discreetly edged back. The last think he needed was for his shameless captain to start telling _those_ stories in front of the overprotective top hat. "I don't think Gramps knows though. He turned odd colours when I asked him if he wanted to know how I caught Zoro."

Sabo dropped his pipe and covered his eyes with his hands. "No! Lu, I really didn't need that mental image. Garp doing- ugh! Especially since I _work_ with proof that the old geezer _does_ know how that works."

Luffy looked thoughtful. "Oh, right. If Gramps didn't know, Dad and I wouldn't be here, would we? Shishishishishi!"

"I need brain bleach," Sabo groaned. One blue eye peeked between gloved fingers to stare at Zoro. "Fine, Roronoa-san is off the hook, as long as he makes you happy. If he hurts you though..." Zoro had never seen someone look so menacing when they bent to pick up a pipe.

"Oh, and Dragon asked me to bring his reply as well. He says not to be disappointed if you don't see him at the wedding- he can't afford to be caught by the old geezer. He says he'll be there though."

Zoro sheathed Wado with a nod. "We expected nothing less."

"Dragon also says that if you ever hurt his son, nowhere on the Grand Line or in any of the Blues will be safe for you ever again."

"Understood."

"Shishishishi! Silly dad. As if Zoro would hurt me!"

A warm presence grew on the deck of the ship, causing all three men to freeze. Between Zoro and Sabo, a translucent figure appeared, a hand on each of their shoulders. Black hair flickered in the wind above a freckled face. Then the figure faded away. Luffy and Sabo both started to cry.

"Ace!" Luffy's teary face was soon buried in Zoro's chest, soaking the swordsman's clothing. Zoro rubbed the rubber man's back slowly.

"Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, his spirit's been following us around since we reunited. It's how I ended up with his hat."

Sabo sniffled and wiped his eyes with a handkerchief. "I think- I think he was trying to tell us that he's given his blessing. He wants the both of us to look after Lu in his stead."

Warm wind swept around the three, ruffling their hair. It was accompanied by the faint sound of deep laughter. When they listened closer, they even thought they heard a voice.

_Outlook D. Sabo, my first brother_

_Roronoa D. Zoro, my last_

_Monkey D. Luffy, our little treasure_

_Thank you for loving me... And each other._


End file.
